My Story

“The path that chose me still sends chills down my spine and fills my heart with warmth.”

Guiding others towards a soul-centered way of being brings tears to my eyes every day.

I bow deeply to your willingness to do the good work, as even coming to this page is a symbol of your bravery. Your courage to dive beneath the surface will yield great fruits.

It’s my great honor to be with you, as you step more fully into aliveness, and walk the path that is only yours to walk.

I have always listened to the call - the silent knowing of my soul, a seed awaiting to emerge through the long winter. That’s the thing about seeds and souls: within each resides a blue print for what is possible. A blueprint for who they are here to be, who they are here to become.

My journey has been long and arduous.

Much like the butterfly, if a cocoon is opened that falls to the earth, the growing butterfly will die. It is a natural process for the butterfly to struggle in their efforts to open their cocoon, preparing its wings to fly. My journey out of the cocoon was my initiation to a soul-centered life, one of presence and peace. Although, the journey was anything but easy, it was necessary. The moth dissolves in a cocoon, literally becoming liquid from which a butterfly is formed. I believe that life is made up of many cocoons, some longer or more intense than others. At the times we dissolve in our cocoons, parts of us die that are ready to be reborn.

My first cocoon was a long one. Growing up in an environment where I did not feel safe, I learned to disappear. I disassociated so completely that my body was numb, I didn’t even experience hunger or thirst signals. It was like I did not exist, as though my life was paper thin, something I was separate from. For years I tried modality after modality. Sometimes traveling great distances to work with therapists, taking courses and seeing healers. It took me a long time to realize that the key to healing and thriving was within me all along: My nervous system.

The nervous system is a self-regulating system...

It is adaptive enough to activate and avoid in the event of a car crash, but does your system ever come back to baseline? It’s an intelligent accommodation to immobilize (freeze/dissociate), to not be present when the bear is eating you, but does your system know how to come back to baseline, where it needs to be?

I maintained the classic high-achieving crash and burn pattern for many years. Meditating and juicing kale, then disappearing for a few days to wallow in my emotions and binge eat ice cream. I did not understand how high the cost of doing business was in that state of being. It looked great from the surface, but it unknowingly drained a great deal of my energy inside.

I developed defensive accommodations and protective strategies that allowed me to function in society really well. I could build companies and juggle the world - cool as cucumber. But when I slowed down, I was totally numb. The way that I was able to avoid the disconnected and painful feelings was to never stop moving. Feeling as if I needed to push “the pedal to the metal” was an unsustainable way of living, so I would also slam on the brakes...

As you can imagine, this cycle burns out the engine completely (i.e. the nervous system).

All in all my system performed in a way that received a 10/10 from society, but was destroying my engine and my inner life force was being drastically depleted.

I am lucky have amazing guides and mentors that have showed me a new way is possible. How to renegotiate past traumatic experiences, and methodically release bound up energy. I no longer had to white knuckle or override. I started to experience (and discharge) the survival physiology and anxiety that was trapped within me.

And then slowly, I had the privilege of meeting and integrating wounded and terrified places into my being, with deep love and compassion. Through this process I learned how to regulate my nervous system. I was in awe at how much more vitality and ease I felt in my body when I no longer had to manage or override my experience.

The aliveness, joy, presence, and calmness coming back into my system was intoxicating and I am SO grateful I had been willing to do the work.

I felt like I finally got to LIVE.

You can be at home wherever you find yourself.